Tag Archives: humour

The Secret Life of Birds

This morning I threw a half-eaten apple out onto my backyard. Two birds immediately landed near it; one began eating ferociously, the other stayed back and twittered. In my half-awake stupor, I stayed at the window a little longer than necessary watching them.

Bird 1: Do you smell that?

Bird 2: Yes, there’s a sweet fruity fragrance..? What is it..? Oh, an apple!

B1: No, it’s rain…

B2: Look Grandpa, it’s so fresh and juicy! (CHOMP, CHOMP)

B1: Be careful son, smell it first. Remember what I told you? If it’s white it could be poisonous. You’ll be pooping all over the electricity wires in no time and you know how your mother hates that. She won’t be able to hang clothes off it for weeks. (Hang on…clothes..?)

B2: Don’t worry Grandpa. It’s so delicious! I can’t wait to tell Mom about this!

B1: Where are your manners? Don’t bite like that! Peck, for godssake! And this isn’t our turf, it belongs to the pies. Hurry up with that apple, I’ll make sure they don’t come too close.

B2: I wish we could take this home to Grandma, she could make baked apple on the red chimney! (CHOMP, CHOMP)

B1: Aish, it’s raining (indeed it was). Come on son, time to go. You know it’s dangerous learning to fly when it’s wet.

B2: But can’t we bring this with us? (gazes forlornly at the apple)

B1: No, you know we can’t bring anything we can’t fit in our beaks with us. We have to go now, your mother expects us home for supper.

B2: Can we come back for it then? Please, Grandpa? Pleaseeeeee?

Both birds fly off into freedom leaving a mangled apple behind, while I hang my head and leave to go do my macroeconomics exam.

Tagged , , ,

Protected: Which do you value more: Time or Money?

This content is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

Tagged , , , ,
%d bloggers like this: